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singing sloth

foolish, simple, awkward, and clumsy potato. bordelique bordelaise. sleeping whoser. psych-o. lost in own bedroom. frustrated with peeled pistachios.

peggy-the-pirate:

peachie5000:

lady-byleth:

willfully:

babyanimalgifs:

rain doggo 

(via)

golden retrievers are still the only breed i’ve ever worked with that go absolutely WILD with excitement for the rain

most dogs tolerate it, some hate it, but golden retrievers, man. they’re on another level

lost in the sauce

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he flat

he just wants to swim

(via numahachi)

skyline-sunset-in-my-veins:

spocks-cock:

fucktheflagandfuckyou:

autumngracy:

punkfaery:

my cat hates taking his pills. the only way we can get him to eat them is to turn it into an elaborate pantomime - we take the packet out of the cupboard slowly and hold it up, saying “oh!! what’s this? what’s this? a TREAT? a TREAT for louis????” while making surprised faces. we offer him a pill… then, before he has a chance to sniff it, we wag our fingers at him and replace it in the packet so it becomes a Tantalising Forbidden Mystery. we continue doing this until he’s so confused and excited that he will eat the pill as fast as possible, just so he can find out what it is before we can take it away from him again. as soon as he’s eaten it he looks utterly disappointed and betrayed, like a child who just ate a delicious sweet only to find it was a chocolate-coated brussels sprout. it never gets old

Op this is the funniest thing I’ve ever read

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op how could you just hide this from me in the tag this makes this objectively 10000000% funnier

50 First Doses

You trick Louis? You trick Louis like a common fool? Oh jail, jail for owners ONE MILLION YE-oh what’s this? A treat?

(via shreeves)

zagreus:

thickness-protection-program:

zagreus:

pull HIS hair. get HIM pregnant

A seahorse wrote this

im gonna flatten you with a cartoonishly large anvil

(via blam-said-the-lady)

wishuwitch asked:

I'd like to make a request. An Iron Maiden... but with hands instead of spikes. Think about it.

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why even stop there lets keep this awful finger train goin

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gayteensupreme:

hypokeimena:

hypokeimena:

i need to show you guys the absurdly saucy pear my parents just casually had out in the fruit bowl like it was normal

im not a talented photographer but these come close to capturing the overall effect (i.e., the raunch factor)

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that pear has an fuckin ass hole

(via shreeves)

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